The morning routine in the Knight household is not always picture perfect.
Last Wednesday, I was supposed to assist with Kindy drop off, but at 7:05am one of the boys had wiped egg into his eyes, the other was having a conniption about not being able to dress as a Ninja Turtle before Book Week, and I had to renege on my promise, leaving my unhappy wife to deal with the mayhem on her own.
By contrast, our most recent Monday morning worked extremely well when we all got up early together to watch some of the Olympic swimming heats. A large part of this success could be attributed to some good communication, organisation and pre-planning. In breaking our usual routine, we had to consider there was no Kindy that day, the boys went to bed early the night before, and a nap time was possible if they struggled with the early rise.
Hope for the best, plan for the worst.
For decades, researchers have pointed to one key success factor that transcends nearly all others in determining a child’s success at school: parental involvement. Students whose parents stay involved in school have better attendance and behaviour, get better grades, demonstrate better social skills and adapt better to school. Parental involvement is not “helicopter parenting” where involvement - sometimes called “hovering” - does more harm than good. Positive parental involvement starts with home routines which support healthy social emotional development from early childhood. Children with regular routines at home have better self-regulation skills and can identify and manage their feelings so they don’t become overwhelmed through their school day. Good parent involvement is providing the school with unique insight and perspective about our boys.
Positive parental involvement is the backbone of a successful parent-teacher partnership, showing a child that an entire team of adults is on their side. By fostering a partnership based on communication, support, consistency, problem-solving, and mutual respect, parents and teachers can create a strong foundation for a child’s success in school.
The partnership between parents and teachers can be supported from home in several ways:
- Speak positively and respectfully about your son's teacher, the school and other children in front of your son. If you complain or criticise the teacher or other children and their families, your child is likely to follow your lead.
- Always ask the questions but don’t always expect an answer. Take an interest with what is happening at school and don’t be fooled by how close boys keep their cards to their chest - deep down they appreciate you trying.
- Read to and with your boys. Even 15-20 minutes daily makes a difference. Parents can go further by ensuring they disconnect from technology and read more each day as well, either as a family or private reading time that sets a good example.
- Establish consistent sleep schedules (to allow for 9-11 hours of sleep) which enable boys to complete their homework, read independently, get enough sleep and have opportunities to communicate with you.
- Use your commute to connect with your boys. Ask them to read to you while you drive and encourage conversations about school.
- Doing just a couple of things each day in the same way to create anchors is important for children. For example, make sure at least one meal occurs at about the same time and is a chance for you to sit together without distractions and share your daily ‘pits and peaks’.
- Establish rituals such as Taco Tuesdays, Sunday movie nights and Saturday footy. Research shows when times are uncertain, and children experience worry, rituals provide an opportunity to share in a trusted environment and sense they’re not alone.
- Boys who are on time start the day settled, relaxed and ready to learn. Boys who are late are often anxious and can take a while to settle into their day. School equipment could be laid out the night before and technology could be turned off in the morning to assist in the process of getting to school before 8:20am.
Matt Knight
Deputy Head of Junior School